Hey everyone, it is Rollo T here to once again tell you all about our hilarious D&D related exploits!
First and foremost though I should state that after the session Paw announced he was done with D&D, so after we NPCed Andraste for this session, it’s likely that nice session he’ll either be put on a bus, or Joe will take over. I’ll get to that later.
Anyway we started off our adventure focusing on Juliet, Garrett, and Viktor back in their prison escaping adventure. To our relief it turns out our equipment was in the torture chamber so thankfully, we were all at full combat ability. That was especially a relief to me since a Druid can’t do crap without an implement. I was close to trying to turn rat bones and shit into a totem. Dangerously close. Anyway, with the words that our escape “lied through the tombs” still on the head, I wanted to try finding a way to the tombs, and down a hallway was separate path that jutted sharply downwards and was blocked by a steel door. I mean come on, how could that not be the tombs? Juliet helped guide Garrett across the chamber blindfolded (didn’t want him to see the carnage of all the bodies he massacred while Super Satan), and he read a plague on the door stating it was the tomb of the Stargazer King. Tomb! Escape! Huzzah! BUT WAIT!
… the door was locked.
That’s how it goes with us isn’t it? Moments earlier we manage to slay a dragon made of pure amber, but now a rusty door is impeding our progress more than any dragon could. Our first attempt to muscle the door down failed, but Viktor picked up a torture device (he’s our little S&M soldier) and pried it open. Inside was a tomb, and the moment we stepped inside two stone dragon statues came to life to attack the intruders. It’s here that I want to say I rolled a natural 20 for luck prior to playing, and I never really had a bad roll this session. While Garrett and Viktor struggled, Juliet thrived and almost single handedly defeated the two monsters. Seriously, she owned. I contemplated changing my name to Lord Commander Juliet after that battle. Still might. It’s awesome to see a Controller as effective as they can be once they actually hit. Placing enemies in a lose/lose situation is awesome.
Anyway, after the battle we opened the tomb, and I expected to see a way out of the dungeon, but instead the crashing waves and rushing winds we heard coming from inside the tomb were actually being produced by an astrolabe found inside the tomb. We could tell the artifact as magical, but as it were we no longer had an avenue of escape. Our escape lied “through the tombs”, and there was nowhere to go from the tombs. We were trapped, and I personally didn’t want to add Royal Grave Robbery to our list of crimes including King Slaying. I do believe that we can redeem ourselves for the blame we have of killing the king, and I didn’t want to add a legitimate crime (and a rather severe one at that) to our problems. However Viktor decided to swipe the astrolabe, and the moment he did we found ourselves whisked away. When one moment we were trying to escape a castle, the next we were now standing in space, staring at an old man who methodically turned the steering wheel atop his ship. We approached him, and the intriguing old man told us that he was the Wheelmaster who steered time. He noted that our group wasn’t complete, and in a snap of his fingers appeared Andraste, Darstine, and Grae. He told us all that we stood at the crossroads of a great destiny, and that each of us were chosen by destiny to be heroes. I really wanted to give a “I don’t believe in destiny” LOST reference, but I didn’t figure Spoony watched the show enough to respond “Yes you do, you just don’t know it yet”.
Nerd references aside, the Wheelmaster allowed us three questions, and I stupidly said, “Do we all get three questions, or is three total?” Rookie mistake number 1. Thankfully the Wheelmaster wasn’t there to screw us over, so he didn’t count that against us. In total we could ask three questions.
Question 1: How can Garrett remove his curse? The answer was vague, but it sounds like he’ll need to close the connection he has with the Scorpion Queen. We don’t have a direct answer, but we have clues to follow at the very least.
Question 2: How can we save the King? Seek out the “Word of Morgana”. Sweet, plothook.
Now for our third question I realized after asking that I should have asked about bringing back Lord Vane, but I didn’t. Instead I wanted to focus on making sure we could escape, and thus:
Question 3: How do we escape the castle? The Wheelmaster asked where we wanted to go, and I remembered Logwyn as being a city of knowledge from early on in the campaign. I figured it would be a good a place as any to start our search for Garrett’s cure and the Word of Morgana. And boosh, in a flash we were teleported into a fountain inside the library of Logwyn. And yes, I stupidly asked someone where I could find a library. I missed the part were Spoony mentioned we were inside one.
Anyway, we managed to get an audience with librarian Selman, and we asked him about the Words of Morgana. We received a load of exposition regarding Morgana who was the Queen of the Feywild who at one time amassed a collection of books regarding dark magic. Eventually she was stricken down and her library lost, but it appears that the Witch Queen is seeking to take her place. To find the Word of Morgana it appears that we may have to find the “Black Library” which is supposedly buried in a swamp. How we’ll find it, I don’t know, but it’s my number one lead. The fact is we’re considered king murderers or at least Juliet, Viktor, and Garrett are, meaning that we can expect to have an entire kingdom searching for us. The number one thing we need to do is find a way to save the King, and clear our names.
We also learned of a fountain that is “rumored” to exist at the source of a river just under the Unholy Woods, you know that forest just north of the Lava Plains and the Obsidian Fortress. Due south of the Mountains of Unending Pain, Death, and Rape, and the Bubblegum Meadows. Okay the last two are fake, but I’m really not looking forward to adventuring in that general direction. However this fountain could potentially cure Garrett of his curse, but how willing his goddess will be at letting him remove the curse is another important factor.
Anyway, we left Logwyn the next morning and traveled south to a port town where we would then travel to Kwenesh and from there, hopefully, the Black Library. There we had Viktor’s awesome Streetwise check net us passage to where we needed to go without much of a problem. Some of us paid to go on board, and others (Garrett, Viktor, and Grae) stayed behind to do shopping. Grae’s Streetwise check to find a bag turned out a whopping 2 with his +1 modifier, so Spoony set Grae up with a small encounter. Several men tried to convince him to join their crew, but Grae screamed for help… but it was like totally a manly scream or something like that. Anyway, Grae and group killed most of the thugs, but two started to run away. Spoony gave the group the option of chasing after them, but they took so long debating that in the end they escaped. The group, just points away from leveling up (well, for at least three of us) boarded the boat, and at that point we stopped for the night.
Next session will involve Spoony trying to get Joe back into the campaign one way or another. Perhaps he’ll play Lord Vane’s son, or perhaps he’ll play Andraste, but the session ended regarding trying to figure out how to get Joe into the next session. Overall the session was short. We started playing around 6 and we called it a night before 9. Still we got a lot done… in theory. As it is we have a goal, though how to accomplish it is not going to be an easy task. How to get to this Black Library is doing to be a trial of its own, and there’s no guarantee we’re even strong enough to enter. In addition time has passed, and before long we wouldn’t be surprised to see bounties out on our heads. The next sessions are going to be very interesting, and I’m pumped to find out what’s going to happen next. Until next time adventurers!